Let me first off set the tone for ya this lovely morning! Laying in bed sleeping soundly with my man, little Kennedy comes in WAY too early with her pillow and blanket to sleep on our floor. With a VERY nagging cough might I add...anywho. She gets my phone and looks at all my "pictures" which also includes any video that has ever been taken on my phone. She LOVES to do that! Which is typically cute. Just not at 6 and 7 am. So needless to say I was up and at em not too long after that. lol. Got me some coffee, got Hillsong United playing on my phone, got the blinds pulled all the way up reavealing GORGEOUS sunshine and a very healthy Team Van Hook garden :) cheesy I know...but I don't care!! So I'm ready for my quiet time. And I actually started into it, writing in my prayer journal. A FABULOUS spiritual habit to start working on if anyone is looking for some ways to start growing spiritually. My prayer journals....and I am proud to say that I have stacks of them...are my everything! I mean, pretty close up there with my bible. Like, I hate to say this, but if there was a fire, I would totally save my ....journals. *exit sun and enter terrible lightning strikes at Rachel* so what?! I could buy a new Bible or go to the nearest hotel to read one every day if I was that desperate. BUT, my prayer journals contain my whole life since Novemberish of 2008. 2 &1/2 straight years of prayer journaling ALMOST every day! I'll shout it loud and proud that God has allowed that to become such a huge part of my life.
I say all this to encourage everyone to maybe do the same. I tell ya, I can look back through my prayer journals and see where God has blessed us ridiculously, walked us through hard times, carried us through the REALLY hard times, spoken to me directly over and over, shed new light on old scriptures, etc. Mostly they are packed full of me being humbled to be able to enter His presence, hear His voice and know Him as a friend. ME!? REALLY YOU LOVE ME GOD?! Lots of that kinda thing!! But that's why His love is so good. Because He loves even me!! AND YOU!!! As full of sin and crap as we are...and I mean chopped full like the best veggie soup in the world...the more sin the better He says! I mean look at the Israelites! His "CHOSEN" people. Why the HECK would He choose them?! Or at least why the heck would He CONTINUE to keep them as His "chosen" people after all the times they turned their back on Him. I sure as mess woulda moved right on to the next people group and thrown the peace sign at them jokers!!! UG. I woulda been SOOOOO mad at them. (Good thing I'm not God!! lol)
Anyway.....it makes for the most UH-MAZING love story that He continued to "choose" them despite all their ish! sin! junk! etc. Also makes for the perfect way to explain His love to anyone we meet who may feel inadequate or undeserving. "Um excuse me...No you're not those things. Take a look at my friends the Israelites. Now you want to see some undeserving punks..." That's a litttle example of some good evangelizing if you want to borrow that line ;) Just credit me in the future! lol jk. Point is...God's love is RIDICULOUS. UNCONDITIONAL. So there's all that...but none of that was even my point of blogging this morning.
My point was this, and it's something I struggle with, and have even shared before. It's the whole sin and conviction thing. My prayer this morning as I started journaling was that God would allow His Spirit to convict me of all the sins that I don't know I'm sinning. WHAT? LAME! NO FUN! I know I know. Who prays that right? Why would you want God to show you all your sins...aka...the "fun stuff" so that you can stop doing it all....BOOO!!! LOL. I'm sure that's what everyone is thinking. But, truly, I want to know what they are. I want them to GO AWAY. I want God to throw them as far as the east is from the west so that I don't have to carry them anymore. There was a story in the Old Testament that I cling to because God gave me VERY clear visual to show me some things. I don't know specific scriptures, I'd have to get some stuff and look up where it was, but it was during the reign of King Asa. There were good kings then bad kings, then good, then bad...etc. King Asa was a good king. He came in after a rotten king who had destroyed the temple and everything in it! King Asa came in and cleaned out the temple. The scriptures say specifically that he not only just cleaned out the junk from the temple, but the also all the junk from the lands that he had captured as well!! Say what?! He was straight hauling that mess OFF!!! That's what I'm talking about!! (PS....If you read those OT stories with a crappy attitude thinking you won't learn a darn thing...you WON'T. If you read them desiring to grow and learn more about God Almighty....you WILL :)
So I was reading this...God was giving me some clarity about some things. I got a visual of me on the ground....and Him up above me, and then a bunch of layers of JUNK that come between me and Him. Sooo.....if there's layers of junk between me and God....that probably means that I am not hearing Him well or seeing Him well or even receiving the blessings that He might be wanting to pour out on me. So the point was, the more I am convicted, and actually repent of my sin and let God get rid of it, the more clear my vision will be. The more I will be blessed. The more I will hear His sweet voice teaching me and rebuking me if necessary. So I am constantly asking God that His spirit would convict me of my sin...because the less sin I have, and the more I am aware of the ones I am struggling with, the more I will experience my God in all sorts of amazing ways!!!
So that was a lot. Some stuff that I wanted to share. Some stuff that I cling to. And just me. My open heart for whoever wants to see it :) For anyone who ever reads this. I pray that God uses me to speak out to whoever. I want to be used. I want to be a vessel. So maybe, just maybe, God will speak to you through this! All glory to Him if soo!!!
much love~~
Rach
Monday, June 13, 2011
Monday, May 2, 2011
Feelings Fest Twenty Eleven.
So here I sit. In this dark....FREEZINGGGG cold hospital room. Weather on this 2nd day of May is unusually cold, rainy and just plain dreary. And the background noise that I'm listening to besides the tapping of the keys on this keyboard, is the precious most BEAUTIFUL sound of my baby sister's baby's heartbeat. Quick yet steady. Soft and gentle, yet loud and pounding all at the same time. If I could insert a sound clip, I totally would :) My eyes are teary and tired. My mind is in a million places. I'm having somewhat of what I would like to refer to as a Feelings Fest. So, I decided I would share! Enjoy!
First of all. I cannot even express the emotions that I feel as I watch Julie lay so peacefully sleeping in her big fluffy hospital bed. Well I'm sure she might beg to differ, but all the pillows & blankies do make it look mighty fluffy! lol. Anyway. Her hair has been gently (between contractions) french braided into one single french braid by yours truly. A favorite of hers since she was big enough to know what a french braid was and ask me to give her one. Her toenails painted from the pedicure we had together a couple of weeks ago during the "false alarm!" The heartbeat of her firstborn. And her E-normous belly moving slowly up and down as she sleeps. *sigh* I'm taken back to a lot of memories. A flood of memories would be a total understatement. My sister and I are as opposite as night and day...and I mean that. If you know us both, you know I tell no lies!! lol. But I tell ya what. If I could go into Wal-Mart and custom order a sister....I would custom order Julie. She is my sister. As different as we are, and as frustrating at times as that is to me, I would do ANYthing for her. And I love her to the moon and back. OK. So I mentioned a few emotions that go along with this whole being an aunt situation. You can imagine that this in itself would be enough for a roller coaster ride. sheesh. Enough tears and sap....I gotta move on before I break down!! lol
Next, I feel as if I need to express all the crazy emotions I'm feeling about this Osama thing. Boy was that a crazy surprise last night?! Totally wasn't expecting that, as I'm sure no one really was. So let me go with my gut first of all. Surprise. Of course. That one was easy. Next.... I'm going to go with relief. I'm not going to say rejoicing, or celebration, not from me at least. I was more on the relief side I think. From all that I know, my gut thought shoo wee. Whatta relief to have such a terrible man gone. They've been trying to get him for so long. How glad they must all be that he is dead and gone. Ok, simultaneously, I'm experiencing extreme heartbreak. As a christian, as a mother, as a whatever else I might be, I was experiencing heartbreak for a soul that may very well (up to God!!) be eternally damned. phew. The thought of that for anyone should wrench a heart. Last year I read through all 18 billion of the Left Behind books. And Revelation, and a few other study books on Revelation. GOD PRICKED MY HEART! Things haven't really been the same since He took me through all of that. I believe He instilled in me somewhat of a sense of urgency and even a boldness about His kingdom coming. So with all of that said. For the past year or so, I've been feeling a lot more compassion for those who are far from Christ. A kindof new feeling to me. Not that I never cared necessarily that there were people on the road to hell and that there were thousands and thousands who were sooooo far from knowing God or desiring to know God. Now, it's just different I am more away, more compassionate, more sensitive and more prayerful of those who may be on that path. Lordy mercy I have prayed some serious prayers over some youth kids this past year. Sometimes I wonder why God would give me that new compassion for those far from Him, and then place me in the middle of a group of some crazy teens! lol. That's a whole notha bowl full of feelings though!!!
So another feeling with the Osama death is pride. Growing up as a sort of military brat, I know what Osama's death means to so many soldiers. Chuck's dad is actually preparing as I type to head over into the danger zone. ug. More feelings. Nausea. Nervousness. Pride. Sadness. Some of you know those all too well. I know that for both my dad and my father in law, this is HUGE. I can't imagine what is going on through their heads. I know for me, to have a dad who is a soldier has always made me puff my chest a little when he shows up somewhere in his uniform! (More tears. ) There were many special times that he missed because he was serving. Many times he showed up late in uniform barely making it because of serving...ie High School graduation :) Man those were cool times. Hard. Emotional, but cool. So geez louise. I have been a total wreck trying to sort out and contain all of these feelings. As the rest of the world probably is as well.
So there ya go. I guess I like this whole blog thing because I can totally spill my guts and feel like a million times better about getting things off my chest. There have been lots of prayers gone up from me to God today. Prayers ranging from the world and the government, to this sweet dark hospital room. So if ya get a chance, do the same for me! Things in this world are going to get crazy. REALLY crazy. That's the way God meant for it to be. Ok....the doc is in!!! Gotta run :) much love blogging world!!
(Almost An Aunt) Rachel :)
First of all. I cannot even express the emotions that I feel as I watch Julie lay so peacefully sleeping in her big fluffy hospital bed. Well I'm sure she might beg to differ, but all the pillows & blankies do make it look mighty fluffy! lol. Anyway. Her hair has been gently (between contractions) french braided into one single french braid by yours truly. A favorite of hers since she was big enough to know what a french braid was and ask me to give her one. Her toenails painted from the pedicure we had together a couple of weeks ago during the "false alarm!" The heartbeat of her firstborn. And her E-normous belly moving slowly up and down as she sleeps. *sigh* I'm taken back to a lot of memories. A flood of memories would be a total understatement. My sister and I are as opposite as night and day...and I mean that. If you know us both, you know I tell no lies!! lol. But I tell ya what. If I could go into Wal-Mart and custom order a sister....I would custom order Julie. She is my sister. As different as we are, and as frustrating at times as that is to me, I would do ANYthing for her. And I love her to the moon and back. OK. So I mentioned a few emotions that go along with this whole being an aunt situation. You can imagine that this in itself would be enough for a roller coaster ride. sheesh. Enough tears and sap....I gotta move on before I break down!! lol
Next, I feel as if I need to express all the crazy emotions I'm feeling about this Osama thing. Boy was that a crazy surprise last night?! Totally wasn't expecting that, as I'm sure no one really was. So let me go with my gut first of all. Surprise. Of course. That one was easy. Next.... I'm going to go with relief. I'm not going to say rejoicing, or celebration, not from me at least. I was more on the relief side I think. From all that I know, my gut thought shoo wee. Whatta relief to have such a terrible man gone. They've been trying to get him for so long. How glad they must all be that he is dead and gone. Ok, simultaneously, I'm experiencing extreme heartbreak. As a christian, as a mother, as a whatever else I might be, I was experiencing heartbreak for a soul that may very well (up to God!!) be eternally damned. phew. The thought of that for anyone should wrench a heart. Last year I read through all 18 billion of the Left Behind books. And Revelation, and a few other study books on Revelation. GOD PRICKED MY HEART! Things haven't really been the same since He took me through all of that. I believe He instilled in me somewhat of a sense of urgency and even a boldness about His kingdom coming. So with all of that said. For the past year or so, I've been feeling a lot more compassion for those who are far from Christ. A kindof new feeling to me. Not that I never cared necessarily that there were people on the road to hell and that there were thousands and thousands who were sooooo far from knowing God or desiring to know God. Now, it's just different I am more away, more compassionate, more sensitive and more prayerful of those who may be on that path. Lordy mercy I have prayed some serious prayers over some youth kids this past year. Sometimes I wonder why God would give me that new compassion for those far from Him, and then place me in the middle of a group of some crazy teens! lol. That's a whole notha bowl full of feelings though!!!
So another feeling with the Osama death is pride. Growing up as a sort of military brat, I know what Osama's death means to so many soldiers. Chuck's dad is actually preparing as I type to head over into the danger zone. ug. More feelings. Nausea. Nervousness. Pride. Sadness. Some of you know those all too well. I know that for both my dad and my father in law, this is HUGE. I can't imagine what is going on through their heads. I know for me, to have a dad who is a soldier has always made me puff my chest a little when he shows up somewhere in his uniform! (More tears. ) There were many special times that he missed because he was serving. Many times he showed up late in uniform barely making it because of serving...ie High School graduation :) Man those were cool times. Hard. Emotional, but cool. So geez louise. I have been a total wreck trying to sort out and contain all of these feelings. As the rest of the world probably is as well.
So there ya go. I guess I like this whole blog thing because I can totally spill my guts and feel like a million times better about getting things off my chest. There have been lots of prayers gone up from me to God today. Prayers ranging from the world and the government, to this sweet dark hospital room. So if ya get a chance, do the same for me! Things in this world are going to get crazy. REALLY crazy. That's the way God meant for it to be. Ok....the doc is in!!! Gotta run :) much love blogging world!!
(Almost An Aunt) Rachel :)
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Transparency
I haven't blogged in a long time. There are quite a few reasons for that. In this blog, I'm going to mention them. Mostly for accountability to myself, also to show the world that I am not perfect, as much as I wish I was. I'm really dreading doing this. And I know it's not something that I necessarily have to do, but for my own self, I need to do it. So here goes.
Most of you (all 2 of you) who follow me may have very well noticed that I have not blogged in QUITE some time. The last time I blogged was about the shambles that this world is in. The craziness that was going on in Egypt that is now taking place all over. Anywho. I miss blogging. BIG time. I miss sharing with other people what God is sharing with me and speaking to me and also sharing what I have been teaching my little Kennedy and JulieAnne, and just what has been going on in our life in general.
Here's the problem. About a month ago, I realized that God wasn't speaking to me as clearly as He had been the past year. I mean, I can boast in Him and tell you in all complete honesty that me and God, we were TIGHT!!! Like daily basis He was shedding new light on things in my life and providing me with wisdom in whatever way I might have needed it. So it came to the point that I recognized that still small voice was void in my life. WHOA RED FLAG! OK. So at least I noticed it, thanks only to His grace, and because of the fact that because He is this kind of God, I'm sure He was longing and aching for our intimate relationship that we had worked SO stinkin hard to build up to where it was! So I recognized the emptiness. The lack of joy. The stress. The busyness...ETC that were all signs of a problem. I am human. I sin. I am not perfect. I fall short....it's my destiny. I will mess up. However you want to say it! As I gradually started replacing the important things in my life with the somewhat less important, I began to unintentionally replace my God with things of less importance. Now do not get me wrong, I have been busy doing some wonderful great things.
Take for example the Mother's Day Out that I was working at! One of the greatest places EVER to work! I loved it, all of the teachers, my kids and everything! But, with my girls being ages 3 & 1, I was coming home exhausted and burnt out from the 2 year old class at school, and then not really wanting to tote my own kids, change their diapers, play with them, love on them, because I'd already been doing that for 10 or so other kids all of Tuesday and Thursday. My own 2 kiddos are at a VERY vital age. They are...VERRRRRRY....high maintenance. Very needy. Very busy, very clingy...the list goes on! And this mama, although not completely neglecting by ANY means, (my rotten children have never gone unloved or uncared for, even when I feel like I am neglecting them, they are still probably receiving more love than the majority of children in this world!) was definitely slacking in the attention department! And I was feeling more and more guilty and stressed each day.
Next problem and this is where anyone with ministry ears to hear, LISTEN UP!! I was completely and utterly bogged down with ministry. To the point that I wanted to QUIT EVERYTHING! Anyone ever get so busy in life that you just want to quit life. Period?! Well that's where I was at. I have always ALWAYS played a major and I mean MAJOR role in whatever Chuck's ministry of the moment is. So since we moved to Jackson last June and began helping to develop the family ministry at Journey Church, I was full on as much as possible! I mean that's just how I roll. I've been known to lead children's worship at 8 months pregnant, take a 6 week old to summer camp, open my home to loud, crazy, AWESOME youth with a newborn and 2 year old....and MUCH MUCH more :) and that is my choice. I have always loved doing that! I'm pretty sure I felt like I could simultaneously nurse a newborn, lead a small group, watch my 2 year old and pat Chuck on the back all while attending some wild youth trip. And I very well may have done that a time or 2!! lol. But the fact of the matter is that as we've been riding out this church plant wave, satan has so very sneakily continued to add one thing after another onto my plate thinking that I wouldn't notice. And most of those things, because he is THAT sneaky, have been "ministry" things. "Oh I'm Rachel, sign me up for any and everything!! I can do it all!! Wahoo! Let's go!! More more more!!" There's my t-shirt that I must've been wearing around for far too long...lol!
But here is my realization, thanks in part to multiple confirmations! God, His word, other ministry wives, and a wonderful book that me and the other Journey pastor wives have been reading called You Can Still Wear Cute Shoes by Lisa McKay!! There's her blog if you'd like to check it out!! She is awesome :) My realization is that doing ministry or ministries or volunteering or whatever with church, DOES NOT MATTER if you are putting your MAIN ministry to the back burner. I needed this reminder BAD: Rachel, your FAMILY is your number 1 ministry!!!! Final answer. Now I'm trying to go easy on myself because this whole 2 little kid thing is really shifting our lives still. I have always been able to juggle things and balance really well. Take for example the fact that I was pregnant and had a baby the same year that I was getting my Masters degree and doing all of my work for that! But as time has gone on and my girls have gotten older and more, well let's say time consuming ;) it has become much more difficult to be as involved as I would like to be. And as I have mentioned before, I am very much a control person, and a perfectionist. Do you think it is easy for that kind of person to tell people no, or back away from things....NO!!!! It's not. It's very VERY hard and against everything that my personality is and knows! But what God was eventually able to get through my thick clouded skull was that I was far too busy and stressed for Him. And He was sooo hurt :( So one by one, ONLY with His help, because I could NEVER do this alone, I began to say no and step back from various things in my life, including...dum dum DUMMMMMM.....MINISTRIES!!!! AHHH!!!!! And ya know what....it's ok!! Chuck is also still getting used to the fact that I cannot do everything like I used to and cannot be as involved as we'd both like for me to be :/ But we will make it through!! No doubt about that!!
So here's my conclusion(s) after a lot of venting and heart clearing...which by the way felt VERY good!
1) I am an EXCELLENT Pastor's Wife no matter what lies the king of deception tries to feed me!
2) My family is my first ministry PERIOD....and if that ministry is not in good condition, then I have NO BUSINESS being in any other!!
3) If I'm not hearing God, it's my own dumb fault and I need to survey my situations!
4) I'm not perfect!!!!
5) I love to blog and it is an EXCELLENT way for me to get out all that I am feeling and still hopefully help other people (or at least give them some good entertainment!! lol)
6) When you have kiddos....nothing is the same. As hard as you may try to keep on trucking, things just won't ever be the same! And that is O-KAY! People understand, and if they don't....well....no comment!
So there it is. Once again my full open and honest transparency! Just me being about as imperfect, chaotic, and busy as any perfectionist can possibly be and trying to remain sane.
I praise You O Lord for humbling me. For teaching me and guiding me every step of the way. For instructing me when I wander away from You and very quickly and tenderly accepting me back into Your loving arms. Reveal to me all of the things that stand in the way of me loving You, seeing You, hearing You, and receiving full blessings from You. I live my life for You alone! Revive me O Lord and grant me the full peace that passes all understanding and a joy that truly comes from down in the depths of my heart. May a light shine in and through me that allows others to see You!
amen.
Most of you (all 2 of you) who follow me may have very well noticed that I have not blogged in QUITE some time. The last time I blogged was about the shambles that this world is in. The craziness that was going on in Egypt that is now taking place all over. Anywho. I miss blogging. BIG time. I miss sharing with other people what God is sharing with me and speaking to me and also sharing what I have been teaching my little Kennedy and JulieAnne, and just what has been going on in our life in general.
Here's the problem. About a month ago, I realized that God wasn't speaking to me as clearly as He had been the past year. I mean, I can boast in Him and tell you in all complete honesty that me and God, we were TIGHT!!! Like daily basis He was shedding new light on things in my life and providing me with wisdom in whatever way I might have needed it. So it came to the point that I recognized that still small voice was void in my life. WHOA RED FLAG! OK. So at least I noticed it, thanks only to His grace, and because of the fact that because He is this kind of God, I'm sure He was longing and aching for our intimate relationship that we had worked SO stinkin hard to build up to where it was! So I recognized the emptiness. The lack of joy. The stress. The busyness...ETC that were all signs of a problem. I am human. I sin. I am not perfect. I fall short....it's my destiny. I will mess up. However you want to say it! As I gradually started replacing the important things in my life with the somewhat less important, I began to unintentionally replace my God with things of less importance. Now do not get me wrong, I have been busy doing some wonderful great things.
Take for example the Mother's Day Out that I was working at! One of the greatest places EVER to work! I loved it, all of the teachers, my kids and everything! But, with my girls being ages 3 & 1, I was coming home exhausted and burnt out from the 2 year old class at school, and then not really wanting to tote my own kids, change their diapers, play with them, love on them, because I'd already been doing that for 10 or so other kids all of Tuesday and Thursday. My own 2 kiddos are at a VERY vital age. They are...VERRRRRRY....high maintenance. Very needy. Very busy, very clingy...the list goes on! And this mama, although not completely neglecting by ANY means, (my rotten children have never gone unloved or uncared for, even when I feel like I am neglecting them, they are still probably receiving more love than the majority of children in this world!) was definitely slacking in the attention department! And I was feeling more and more guilty and stressed each day.
Next problem and this is where anyone with ministry ears to hear, LISTEN UP!! I was completely and utterly bogged down with ministry. To the point that I wanted to QUIT EVERYTHING! Anyone ever get so busy in life that you just want to quit life. Period?! Well that's where I was at. I have always ALWAYS played a major and I mean MAJOR role in whatever Chuck's ministry of the moment is. So since we moved to Jackson last June and began helping to develop the family ministry at Journey Church, I was full on as much as possible! I mean that's just how I roll. I've been known to lead children's worship at 8 months pregnant, take a 6 week old to summer camp, open my home to loud, crazy, AWESOME youth with a newborn and 2 year old....and MUCH MUCH more :) and that is my choice. I have always loved doing that! I'm pretty sure I felt like I could simultaneously nurse a newborn, lead a small group, watch my 2 year old and pat Chuck on the back all while attending some wild youth trip. And I very well may have done that a time or 2!! lol. But the fact of the matter is that as we've been riding out this church plant wave, satan has so very sneakily continued to add one thing after another onto my plate thinking that I wouldn't notice. And most of those things, because he is THAT sneaky, have been "ministry" things. "Oh I'm Rachel, sign me up for any and everything!! I can do it all!! Wahoo! Let's go!! More more more!!" There's my t-shirt that I must've been wearing around for far too long...lol!
But here is my realization, thanks in part to multiple confirmations! God, His word, other ministry wives, and a wonderful book that me and the other Journey pastor wives have been reading called You Can Still Wear Cute Shoes by Lisa McKay!! There's her blog if you'd like to check it out!! She is awesome :) My realization is that doing ministry or ministries or volunteering or whatever with church, DOES NOT MATTER if you are putting your MAIN ministry to the back burner. I needed this reminder BAD: Rachel, your FAMILY is your number 1 ministry!!!! Final answer. Now I'm trying to go easy on myself because this whole 2 little kid thing is really shifting our lives still. I have always been able to juggle things and balance really well. Take for example the fact that I was pregnant and had a baby the same year that I was getting my Masters degree and doing all of my work for that! But as time has gone on and my girls have gotten older and more, well let's say time consuming ;) it has become much more difficult to be as involved as I would like to be. And as I have mentioned before, I am very much a control person, and a perfectionist. Do you think it is easy for that kind of person to tell people no, or back away from things....NO!!!! It's not. It's very VERY hard and against everything that my personality is and knows! But what God was eventually able to get through my thick clouded skull was that I was far too busy and stressed for Him. And He was sooo hurt :( So one by one, ONLY with His help, because I could NEVER do this alone, I began to say no and step back from various things in my life, including...dum dum DUMMMMMM.....MINISTRIES!!!! AHHH!!!!! And ya know what....it's ok!! Chuck is also still getting used to the fact that I cannot do everything like I used to and cannot be as involved as we'd both like for me to be :/ But we will make it through!! No doubt about that!!
So here's my conclusion(s) after a lot of venting and heart clearing...which by the way felt VERY good!
1) I am an EXCELLENT Pastor's Wife no matter what lies the king of deception tries to feed me!
2) My family is my first ministry PERIOD....and if that ministry is not in good condition, then I have NO BUSINESS being in any other!!
3) If I'm not hearing God, it's my own dumb fault and I need to survey my situations!
4) I'm not perfect!!!!
5) I love to blog and it is an EXCELLENT way for me to get out all that I am feeling and still hopefully help other people (or at least give them some good entertainment!! lol)
6) When you have kiddos....nothing is the same. As hard as you may try to keep on trucking, things just won't ever be the same! And that is O-KAY! People understand, and if they don't....well....no comment!
So there it is. Once again my full open and honest transparency! Just me being about as imperfect, chaotic, and busy as any perfectionist can possibly be and trying to remain sane.
I praise You O Lord for humbling me. For teaching me and guiding me every step of the way. For instructing me when I wander away from You and very quickly and tenderly accepting me back into Your loving arms. Reveal to me all of the things that stand in the way of me loving You, seeing You, hearing You, and receiving full blessings from You. I live my life for You alone! Revive me O Lord and grant me the full peace that passes all understanding and a joy that truly comes from down in the depths of my heart. May a light shine in and through me that allows others to see You!
amen.
Thursday, February 10, 2011
Aware. Prepare. Rare. Scare. Fair. Share.
I like to choose clever or catchy titles so that people will read my blogs if they so choose. Today I chose a few rhyming words that I have some phrases or sentences to put with.
Aware--> are you aware of what is going on in the world today?
Prepare--> are you prepared for mass chaos or craziness to possibly take place in the world?
Rare--> stuff like this has been going on for a lonnnng time, however if you are a Christian, you understand the significance of all that is going on & that it is a rare thing, just like the Holocaust was a "rare" & historical event.
Scare--> what is going on is something that VERY WELL could be scary to me & anyone! However, as Christians we are called to fear nothing but God and that He will take care of us. Here is a very short list of many scriptures to reinforce that.
Psalm 12:2 Surely God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid. The Lord, the Lord, is my strength and my song; He has become my salvation.
Psalm 23:4 I will fear no evil for You (God) are with me.
Psalm 27:1 The Lord is my light and my salvation - whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life - of whom shall I be afraid?
Psalm 27:3 Though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear.
Psalm 56:3 Whenever I am afraid, I will trust in You.
Psalm 56:11 KJV In God have I put my trust. I will not be afraid of what man can do to me.
Psalm 57:1 KJV Be gracious to me, O God; be gracious to me, for my soul takes refuge in Thee. In the shadow of of Thy wings I will take refuge, until destruction passes by.
Psalm 121:1-8 (KJV) I will lift up my eyes to the hills from where comes my help. My help comes from the Lord, which made heaven and earth. He will not allow your foot to be moved. He that keeps you will not slumber. Behold, He that keeps Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord is your keeper. The Lord is your shade upon your right hand. The sun shall not smite you by day, nor the moon by night. The Lord shall preserve you from all evil. He shall preserve your soul (MIND, thoughts, memories, perceptions). The Lord shall preserve your going out and your coming in from this time forth and even for evermore.
Isaiah 8:17 I will put my trust in Him.
Isaiah 26:3 You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You.
That list goes on & on....check this out!
Fair--> It's not fair that we not know what's going on in our country. We are dumb sometimes. So what?! lol
Share--> we need to share Jesus with others like never before. We need to share His word with others like never before. Urgency is a word that God has been pounding in my head for the past year or so.
So I'm gonna put in a nutshell what I know. Chuck is really kinda smart in all of this. He has helped me to understand the severity of what is going on in Egypt at this time. An example of someone who is VERY aware! lol. Thank goodness or else I would be clueless! (Let's be honest, news is sometimes pretty boring, especially if you have no clue what is going on!)
The people of Egypt have been revolting. Mubarak is their current dictator. They want him to step down. He spoke today and said that he will not step down, and finish his term which ends in September. There are 10's of 1000's of people in Cairo who were waiting to hear their leader's speech. They were hoping he was going to say he was stepping down and instead he said the opposite...they are MAD!! Cairo is CRAZY RIGHT NOW!! YIKES.
America supports Egypt. Like over 1 billion $'s a year. We are allies with them. One of the reasons is because they have a peace treaty with Israel. **THIS IS WHERE THE IMPORTANT STUFF COMES IN!!** We always want to be at peace with Israel. The Jews are God's people. Everyone knows this. If you're not sure about this, or don't believe me, research it. If you don't believe in God or Jesus, and want to learn more about this, I would suggest that you read the Bible, not as God's word but as history because it is precisely that. There is proof and evidence that it is REAL HISTORY. So even if you're not a believer, you can read it to understand some of the history of Israel and God's people.
Anyway. As long as Mubarak, dictator that he is, stays in his position, then the peace treaty that Egypt has with Israel will remain intact. If & when, no when he steps down in September or earlier, it is highly likely that the muslim brotherhood will take over. This is what most people are saying is the most logical & probable choice for they are the "most organized" group. Here is the HUGE problem. The main spiritual leader of the muslim brotherhood is on video saying things like the Jews had it coming (with Hitler) and hopefully it's their turn next! "I will shoot Allah's enemies, the Jews." He says. ok. So if you aren't starting to see the badness yet. You soon will! Let me tell you, this is some big, big stuff. If someone goes to war with Israel & tries to overtake them, that is bad bad news. The Jews or Israelites (whichever you choose to say) are God's chosen people. And He is very protective of them and jealous for them.
Do some research of your own. Ask someone who watches the news all the time and knows. Sometimes women are dumb when it comes to this kind of stuff but don't take that label with this time. Research it. Quiz people who know. Ask questions. Dig deeper. Read your Bible for cryin' out loud!!! lol. God grants wisdom and confidence in Him even during and especially during conflict such as this. But promise you won't just sit back and be dense to all of it. Become aware. Know what is going on in your country. And most importantly PRAY! Cover your family with prayer. Cover our government and our soldiers daily. Cover your church. Cover the people all over the world that this is affecting. Pray for our future. Pray for wisdom and confidence so as not to become fearful or anxious. Use all of this to grow your faith.
Here are a few terms or words that you can start with in your research:
Hosni Mubarak
Muslim Brotherhood
(note: on their English page, all looks fine and dandy, on their Arabic page, the truth unfolds)
Cairo
caliphate
Sharia Law
A lot of times I share stuff that God has shared with me, stuff that I struggle with, stuff that I'm good at etc. Today I encourage you to be a Godly woman (or man) that knows what is going on and is fervently praying over it all.
In GOD we Trust~Rach
P.S. Leave some comments. Share your thoughts. What do YOU think?!
Aware--> are you aware of what is going on in the world today?
Prepare--> are you prepared for mass chaos or craziness to possibly take place in the world?
Rare--> stuff like this has been going on for a lonnnng time, however if you are a Christian, you understand the significance of all that is going on & that it is a rare thing, just like the Holocaust was a "rare" & historical event.
Scare--> what is going on is something that VERY WELL could be scary to me & anyone! However, as Christians we are called to fear nothing but God and that He will take care of us. Here is a very short list of many scriptures to reinforce that.
Psalm 12:2 Surely God is my salvation; I will trust and not be afraid. The Lord, the Lord, is my strength and my song; He has become my salvation.
Psalm 23:4 I will fear no evil for You (God) are with me.
Psalm 27:1 The Lord is my light and my salvation - whom shall I fear? The Lord is the stronghold of my life - of whom shall I be afraid?
Psalm 27:3 Though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear.
Psalm 56:3 Whenever I am afraid, I will trust in You.
Psalm 56:11 KJV In God have I put my trust. I will not be afraid of what man can do to me.
Psalm 57:1 KJV Be gracious to me, O God; be gracious to me, for my soul takes refuge in Thee. In the shadow of of Thy wings I will take refuge, until destruction passes by.
Psalm 121:1-8 (KJV) I will lift up my eyes to the hills from where comes my help. My help comes from the Lord, which made heaven and earth. He will not allow your foot to be moved. He that keeps you will not slumber. Behold, He that keeps Israel shall neither slumber nor sleep. The Lord is your keeper. The Lord is your shade upon your right hand. The sun shall not smite you by day, nor the moon by night. The Lord shall preserve you from all evil. He shall preserve your soul (MIND, thoughts, memories, perceptions). The Lord shall preserve your going out and your coming in from this time forth and even for evermore.
Proverbs 9:10 Fear of the Lord is the beginning of knowledge.
Proverbs 10:27 The fear of the Lord prolongs days, but the years of the wicked shall be shortened.
Proverbs 14:26 In the fear of the Lord, there is strong confidence.
Proverbs 29:25 Fear of man will prove to be a snare, but whoever trusts in the Lord is kept safe.
Isaiah 8:17 I will put my trust in Him.
Isaiah 26:3 You will keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on You, because he trusts in You.
That list goes on & on....check this out!
Fair--> It's not fair that we not know what's going on in our country. We are dumb sometimes. So what?! lol
Share--> we need to share Jesus with others like never before. We need to share His word with others like never before. Urgency is a word that God has been pounding in my head for the past year or so.
So I'm gonna put in a nutshell what I know. Chuck is really kinda smart in all of this. He has helped me to understand the severity of what is going on in Egypt at this time. An example of someone who is VERY aware! lol. Thank goodness or else I would be clueless! (Let's be honest, news is sometimes pretty boring, especially if you have no clue what is going on!)
The people of Egypt have been revolting. Mubarak is their current dictator. They want him to step down. He spoke today and said that he will not step down, and finish his term which ends in September. There are 10's of 1000's of people in Cairo who were waiting to hear their leader's speech. They were hoping he was going to say he was stepping down and instead he said the opposite...they are MAD!! Cairo is CRAZY RIGHT NOW!! YIKES.
America supports Egypt. Like over 1 billion $'s a year. We are allies with them. One of the reasons is because they have a peace treaty with Israel. **THIS IS WHERE THE IMPORTANT STUFF COMES IN!!** We always want to be at peace with Israel. The Jews are God's people. Everyone knows this. If you're not sure about this, or don't believe me, research it. If you don't believe in God or Jesus, and want to learn more about this, I would suggest that you read the Bible, not as God's word but as history because it is precisely that. There is proof and evidence that it is REAL HISTORY. So even if you're not a believer, you can read it to understand some of the history of Israel and God's people.
Anyway. As long as Mubarak, dictator that he is, stays in his position, then the peace treaty that Egypt has with Israel will remain intact. If & when, no when he steps down in September or earlier, it is highly likely that the muslim brotherhood will take over. This is what most people are saying is the most logical & probable choice for they are the "most organized" group. Here is the HUGE problem. The main spiritual leader of the muslim brotherhood is on video saying things like the Jews had it coming (with Hitler) and hopefully it's their turn next! "I will shoot Allah's enemies, the Jews." He says. ok. So if you aren't starting to see the badness yet. You soon will! Let me tell you, this is some big, big stuff. If someone goes to war with Israel & tries to overtake them, that is bad bad news. The Jews or Israelites (whichever you choose to say) are God's chosen people. And He is very protective of them and jealous for them.
Do some research of your own. Ask someone who watches the news all the time and knows. Sometimes women are dumb when it comes to this kind of stuff but don't take that label with this time. Research it. Quiz people who know. Ask questions. Dig deeper. Read your Bible for cryin' out loud!!! lol. God grants wisdom and confidence in Him even during and especially during conflict such as this. But promise you won't just sit back and be dense to all of it. Become aware. Know what is going on in your country. And most importantly PRAY! Cover your family with prayer. Cover our government and our soldiers daily. Cover your church. Cover the people all over the world that this is affecting. Pray for our future. Pray for wisdom and confidence so as not to become fearful or anxious. Use all of this to grow your faith.
Here are a few terms or words that you can start with in your research:
Hosni Mubarak
Muslim Brotherhood
(note: on their English page, all looks fine and dandy, on their Arabic page, the truth unfolds)
Cairo
caliphate
Sharia Law
A lot of times I share stuff that God has shared with me, stuff that I struggle with, stuff that I'm good at etc. Today I encourage you to be a Godly woman (or man) that knows what is going on and is fervently praying over it all.
In GOD we Trust~Rach
P.S. Leave some comments. Share your thoughts. What do YOU think?!
Saturday, February 5, 2011
Supermom!!
Chuck woke up to leave at the buttcrack of dawn. The dog ran away when he let him out to pee. He luckily found the dog. Woke the girls up when he brought the dog in beating him & yelling at him. He left to go to Memphis. JulieAnne woke up crying with diarrhea. Figured out she can't drink whole milk. Had to do emergency bathing. Made breakfast. Skyped with Grammy. Ran the dishwasher. Shouted the poo out of the rug. Started making cupcakes for the birthday party. Discovered Kennedy dipping her finger into the cupcake batter. Later discovered Kennedy eating the Halls Strawberry cough drops I got for her. Laid both girls down to sleep by 10:30.
WHO'S TIRED???!!!! MEEE!!!!!
Yea so today's blog, (apologies for not blogging in FAR too long!) is about being a mom. I have this GIANT soap box that I brought in just for today's blog. So hold on while I climb up my ladder and get on it! Ready?
This blog is for MOMS!! I'm gonna tell you what?! Sometimes I get so down on myself about not working outside of the house. Or not being an A+ perfect mom or person in general. But today is about how awesome moms are. Period. Just for a few brief moments, take a step back and look at your life as a mom.
First of all, if you haven't ever thought this, think it now, YOU KEEP HUMAN BEINGS ALIVE! That is a huge stinking responsibility. I mean. Since the moment you got pregnant with your little one(s) you did every single thing you possibly could to care for them. That's a pretty big deal ya know. You grocery shop. When you grocery shop, you very carefully pick out things that your children, and family are going to like. You put gas in your car so that you can take your family wherever they need to go. You dish out money so that your children can go to school, have clothing, develop skills, gifts and talents. You tie shoes. Wipe noses and butts. Change diapers. Wash clothes. Put clothes away. Switch out clothes when seasons change. Buy new things when your child all of a sudden sprouts 2 inches. Keep running lists of what is needed in the house. Pay bills. Look for lost toys, shoes, socks, etc. Wash dishes galore. Run errands galore. Make doctor visits to keep your child healthy. Cook meals (or order them!) Make beds. Clean toilets. Brush little teeth. Give baths. Discipline. Teach right from wrong. Teach manners. Teach respect. Teach about Jesus. Take kiddos to church. Buckle seat belts. Wipe messes. Mop floors. Vacuum. And the list could go on for days. But the problem is, we hardly have time to take a step back to see all the amazing things we do as moms. We are "expected" to do those things. We might be considered _____ if we do not. But here's the newsflash....WE DON'T HAVE TO DO ANY OF THOSE THINGS!!!! We daily make a choice to be a good mother and wife. We do those things out of love. There are mothers out there who are daily choosing not to do those things. Not to brush their kids teeth or take their children to the doctor or clean their house. Those are things that we as moms do because of love. And here's the second newsflash...WE ARE AWESOME FOR DOING THOSE THINGS!!!
Now I'm not being overconfident or cocky, or full of myself or anything like that. I'm just being plain honest. To be a good mother or wife is something that not everyone chooses to do, and to make that choice is an amazing thing. (If you're not a mom yet and are planning to be a mom one day, I'm making the assumption that you also will be a mother who does all of those things....so go ahead and consider yourself a part of this supermom blog as well!!!) Those things are not easy. People do not WANT to do those things. I mean, control and neat freaks aside, raise your hand if you look forward to cleaning toilets, scraping burnt junk off dishes and changing runny poo diapers???!!! oooo ME ME ME!! NOT!!
So if you're a mom who does those things, or is already past the phase of doing those things and are smiling on the inside as you watch your own children do them (mom! ;) ) then here's a giant message from me. YOU ARE AWESOME!!! YOU ARE AMAZING!! I crack up at Mother's Day. I firmly believe that every single day should be Mother's Day. Not a single day should go by without a thank you to us...who agrees? It feels good to be appreciated. Don't get me wrong. I know good and well that we don't do all of those millions of things to be appreciated. But I tell Chuck pretty often that I could never and will never get tired of hearing him say that I'm a good mom. We deserve to hear that every now and then.
It's hard. Very hard. But the other night I re-read Proverbs 31 and I'll tell you this...if my children & husband don't rise up and call me blessed, than I am a waste (vs 28). If I don't live my life to be like Christ in all ways, being a mother and spouse included, then I am wasting my life away daily. If my husband doesn't have full confidence in me (vs 11) than I don't even deserve to be a wife. If I am not at least making the effort to be like Jesus daily. Than I don't deserve the privilege of being in those roles. I'm not the best mom, and I'm definitely not the best wife. But I try. I fall and fail and everything else, but His grace is sufficient for me. It covers me afresh each day so that when I have a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day....then I know I have a new chance tomorrow. As dirty and grungy as I may have been yesterday, today I am awakened with beautiful purest of white garments. Praise the Lord huh?!
I say all of this to give ya a boost. I know I sure as heck need a boost. So I've been boosting myself lately! I think that's ok. We all need encouragement! And if you are a mom, wife or soon to be or one day to be mom....then be encouraged. You're doing amazing! Way to make the choices to do what you do! From me to you, here's a pat on the back :) And if you have never checked out Proverbs 31, the wife of Noble Character then you should check it out, and if you have, but haven't in a while or a day even....then check it out again today and maybe every day!
Doing Hard Things for Him~
Rach
WHO'S TIRED???!!!! MEEE!!!!!
Yea so today's blog, (apologies for not blogging in FAR too long!) is about being a mom. I have this GIANT soap box that I brought in just for today's blog. So hold on while I climb up my ladder and get on it! Ready?
This blog is for MOMS!! I'm gonna tell you what?! Sometimes I get so down on myself about not working outside of the house. Or not being an A+ perfect mom or person in general. But today is about how awesome moms are. Period. Just for a few brief moments, take a step back and look at your life as a mom.
First of all, if you haven't ever thought this, think it now, YOU KEEP HUMAN BEINGS ALIVE! That is a huge stinking responsibility. I mean. Since the moment you got pregnant with your little one(s) you did every single thing you possibly could to care for them. That's a pretty big deal ya know. You grocery shop. When you grocery shop, you very carefully pick out things that your children, and family are going to like. You put gas in your car so that you can take your family wherever they need to go. You dish out money so that your children can go to school, have clothing, develop skills, gifts and talents. You tie shoes. Wipe noses and butts. Change diapers. Wash clothes. Put clothes away. Switch out clothes when seasons change. Buy new things when your child all of a sudden sprouts 2 inches. Keep running lists of what is needed in the house. Pay bills. Look for lost toys, shoes, socks, etc. Wash dishes galore. Run errands galore. Make doctor visits to keep your child healthy. Cook meals (or order them!) Make beds. Clean toilets. Brush little teeth. Give baths. Discipline. Teach right from wrong. Teach manners. Teach respect. Teach about Jesus. Take kiddos to church. Buckle seat belts. Wipe messes. Mop floors. Vacuum. And the list could go on for days. But the problem is, we hardly have time to take a step back to see all the amazing things we do as moms. We are "expected" to do those things. We might be considered _____ if we do not. But here's the newsflash....WE DON'T HAVE TO DO ANY OF THOSE THINGS!!!! We daily make a choice to be a good mother and wife. We do those things out of love. There are mothers out there who are daily choosing not to do those things. Not to brush their kids teeth or take their children to the doctor or clean their house. Those are things that we as moms do because of love. And here's the second newsflash...WE ARE AWESOME FOR DOING THOSE THINGS!!!
Now I'm not being overconfident or cocky, or full of myself or anything like that. I'm just being plain honest. To be a good mother or wife is something that not everyone chooses to do, and to make that choice is an amazing thing. (If you're not a mom yet and are planning to be a mom one day, I'm making the assumption that you also will be a mother who does all of those things....so go ahead and consider yourself a part of this supermom blog as well!!!) Those things are not easy. People do not WANT to do those things. I mean, control and neat freaks aside, raise your hand if you look forward to cleaning toilets, scraping burnt junk off dishes and changing runny poo diapers???!!! oooo ME ME ME!! NOT!!
So if you're a mom who does those things, or is already past the phase of doing those things and are smiling on the inside as you watch your own children do them (mom! ;) ) then here's a giant message from me. YOU ARE AWESOME!!! YOU ARE AMAZING!! I crack up at Mother's Day. I firmly believe that every single day should be Mother's Day. Not a single day should go by without a thank you to us...who agrees? It feels good to be appreciated. Don't get me wrong. I know good and well that we don't do all of those millions of things to be appreciated. But I tell Chuck pretty often that I could never and will never get tired of hearing him say that I'm a good mom. We deserve to hear that every now and then.
It's hard. Very hard. But the other night I re-read Proverbs 31 and I'll tell you this...if my children & husband don't rise up and call me blessed, than I am a waste (vs 28). If I don't live my life to be like Christ in all ways, being a mother and spouse included, then I am wasting my life away daily. If my husband doesn't have full confidence in me (vs 11) than I don't even deserve to be a wife. If I am not at least making the effort to be like Jesus daily. Than I don't deserve the privilege of being in those roles. I'm not the best mom, and I'm definitely not the best wife. But I try. I fall and fail and everything else, but His grace is sufficient for me. It covers me afresh each day so that when I have a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day....then I know I have a new chance tomorrow. As dirty and grungy as I may have been yesterday, today I am awakened with beautiful purest of white garments. Praise the Lord huh?!
I say all of this to give ya a boost. I know I sure as heck need a boost. So I've been boosting myself lately! I think that's ok. We all need encouragement! And if you are a mom, wife or soon to be or one day to be mom....then be encouraged. You're doing amazing! Way to make the choices to do what you do! From me to you, here's a pat on the back :) And if you have never checked out Proverbs 31, the wife of Noble Character then you should check it out, and if you have, but haven't in a while or a day even....then check it out again today and maybe every day!
Doing Hard Things for Him~
Rach
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